Real Faith

How can you keep on believing and trusting a God after every knockout blow in life? After every piece of bad news, every struggle...how can one really keep the faith and keep believing after that?

I'll let my sister Melissa answer that one for you...

She wrote this the next day after a pretty bad scare related to her lymphoma, during which she was rushed to the hospital by ambulance.

This is what she wrote on her blog:

"I am resting in knowing that our God does not change. Although the circumstances of my life have changed, He is the same today as He was seven months ago when this storm began. I trust Him today with my whole heart, and I am believing that He is going to carry me through this. "

PLEASE PRAY NOW

My sister Missy is an ambulance on her way to the hospital as we speak. She was coughing up blood and called 911

Please pray for her!!!!!

Visit her blog!

10 Months, Sweet Baby

It's hard to believe...

Today our sweet baby Tyler Michael would have been 10 months old.

Sometimes it feels like it was years ago when we saw him last, but then when I close my eyes, I can remember him so clearly. I can remember standing over his little bed and studying everything about him. Down to his cute little toes. I loved watching him wiggle and raise his little hand, and then I loved lowering my finger to his hand so he would grip on. These and so many more are memories tucked into my heart forever.

It's amazing how we can miss so much about him; we only knew him for that short time.

I remember shortly after the funeral, smelling his hospital blanket...and somehow I could still smell him. I held it to my face and sobbed. I remember feeling that the overwhelming, sick feeling was never going to go away. Everyone told me that with time, it would get better. At that moment, I didn't want that. I didn't want his sweet memory to grow distant, to get fainter. I wanted everything about him to be so fresh on my mind.

But it's true...the days and months have taken us further physically from those precious times. I close my eyes and it takes me a little while longer to remember the details. But they still come back to me...further from my mind, but not from my heart. And though there may be tears, my heart smiles now when I think of him.

My Sweet Baby Boy~ Even after 10 months, we could not be more proud of a baby. You were perfect in every way. But Tyler, now you are even more perfect...perfectly whole and well in heaven. I've seen you in my mind many times and what age I imagine you to be... I imagine you being 8 or 9 and running, playing... Daddy and I pray that God lets you know how much we love you, our sweet boy.

You decide...

Look carefully at these pictures, for they are not pictures I share casually.

Are they pictures of a baby? Of course they are.

See how he grips my finger.

Even at only 25 weeks gestation.

Imagine his soft cries instantly being calmed when he heard his mommy's voice speak to him during his first days. My proudest, happiest moment. He knew me. And often in his first few days, he would stretch his little hand up as I spoke.

Only 25 weeks gestation, but a baby that knew his mommy and daddy and clung to us as much as he could.

So is it my right to unnecessarily kill him while he lies there?

No, that would be called murder, and I would be in jail right now.

But if I kill him while he's still within, or partially within, the safety of my body, then that is okay?? Really?

I have had this opinion long before I ever had the blessing of meeting my baby boy. Whatever you do, don't fool yourself by thinking my strong opinion stems from the traumatic loss of my child. However, I am now one of many who has come face to face with such a little one...a baby that came before their due time. I saw how he was virtually breathing on his own his first couple of days. I saw how he was a normal baby, just minus a few pounds.

And he was born during my second trimester.

Think about it. Look at the facts for yourselves and see the ways abortions are performed. And that's a woman's right, really? If you agree with that, do you have any idea how these are performed and to what age they will perform them to?? They could potentially be performed through third trimester.

Forget passionate opinions. I read the straight facts myself from the American Pregnancy Association website. I wanted to read the unbiased material of how abortions are performed, and it was enough to make me sick.

Knowing people call that a woman's right.... Does the baby have any rights? No, they wouldn't, because they are silent and dependant on the protection from the one carrying them.


I noticed that they often just referred to the baby as "pregnancy tissue." Call me crazy, but my pregnancy tissue comes really close to resembling a baby.

Look at the pictures of Tyler yourself, and tell me if that is simply a fetus, pregnancy tissue. How does its location determine whether it is a valid life, worth saving or obviously worth killing?

I don't understand how we have become so desensitized to this whole concept that we easily refer to it as a woman's rights, and close the discussion.

I believe in women's rights, trust me. But this one does not qualify.

I won't bother describing in detail the many ways the lives of these living, dependant babies are ended. You read and find out for yourself.

American Pregnancy Association

If you are pro-choice, and you decided against reading the above unbiased information, I don't mean this harshly, but please ask yourself why.

Keep whatever opinions you want. But whenever you talk about our women's rights, I hope you remember these pictures. Remember the bond you see happening even at 25 weeks and remember...

He was a baby.

Peace in the Storm

Please read the update about my sister and, if you are willing, pray for her and her family--

www.danceintherainmelissa.blogspot.com

It seems my family's boat is rocking some more...but I have to say that I have such an incredible peace in my heart right now. I mentioned it in the previous post below, that being a Christian doesn't mean that you are shielded from crap happening in your life. It just means that you have handed to you such amazing peace that you cannot even describe...peace filling the spaces where anger and bitterness could easily take over instead. And this is peace that I cannot take an ounce of credit for.

We would appreciate your prayers for her right now... prayers for rest for her and Doug, and for the kids to have a sense of normalcy and security through this all.

"And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Him." ~Philipians 4:7

Open the Eyes of My Heart

I recently emailed an out-of-state friend, just to vent to her about how it's so tiring for life to be so hard all the time. She emailed me back, and it was just exactly what I needed to hear.

Sometimes as Christians, we feel like we can't admit the times along the way when it's really hard to believe there's a plan for all this. At least it's hard for me to admit that. I can tell anyone when I'm struggling with life...I've never had a problem being open. But what's hard is saying that I have a hard time believing and trusting God through all this. I debated about even sharing this, as I don't want it to be used to tear down someone's faith, or solidify someone's beliefs who doesn't believe there's even a God in the first place. But, I've realized I want to be open about it. This is real life, and the journey of a Christian who's clinging to what she does believe in her heart.... Things aren't always easy on this road of life. I guess that's why we're human, and God is our loving heavenly Father. There will be times that I stumble and fall, and that can get pretty overwhelming when that becomes all I focus on.

Last Sunday at church, they sang "Open the eyes of my heart, Lord..." When I'm looking around with just my eyes, I see disappointment. I see major loss. I see what my arms should be holding. I see daily struggles that can just weigh one down until they feel like they're drowning in it. It's so easy for the eyes of our hearts to become closed due to bitterness, doubt and anger. But as I sang that song last Sunday, I felt the eyes of my heart open again. Eyes that can see more and further and a much bigger picture than my physical eyes can see. I felt a little glimmer of peace again. It's so easy to get caught up in the little disappointments and the BIG ones, and not remember that He is working all things together for good.

And that's what helps me deal with the anger and the doubt.

My friend that I emailed said that when we go though times in our life when we have doubt, that God sends us people that will help to carry our faith for us...until we can step back up and believe again. How blessed I am to have friends like that. Thank you, my sweet friend Debbie, and my friends here in Pa that have done that for me. Thank you for not only thinking of me, but for standing by us and praying for us every step of the way. Those prayers will be working in our lives for a long time.

I was thinking during that church service how we were never promised that bad things would not happen to us. But we are promised that God will help to carry us through every trouble. We are promised peace in the storm. I pray that the eyes to my heart stay open to see the bigger picture. I pray that all of this is used to make me stronger than I ever was before.

"Be confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it." Phil. 1:6

Please read...

a message from my sister...

www.danceintherainmelissa.blogspot.com