Tuesday, August 19, 2008

My Sister

It really doesn't matter in the long run if I ever see those necklaces again or not. I'm instantly reminded of more important things after talking with my bro-in-law Doug tonight. Today, my sister went to the cancer center in Indy as opposed to the one in her previous hometown in Dayton. The new cancer center rearranged the order of the medicine during this treatment, making her more nauseous then she's ever been. She's been vomiting since then, and I hope she's able to sleep now.

If you are willing, please pray for her. It's hard to see someone you love go through this. I wish I could still help her, but I am thankful that she has a friend with her helping with her family right now.

Monday, August 18, 2008

A Downhill-Only Roller Coaster

You know, usually the good thing about life being a roller coaster ride is that it's equally full of the good and bad moments. That would be why right now, at this moment in time, I'm comparing my life (lately) to what feels like a roller coaster that doesn't seem to know how to go back up.

I don't blog to get pity or sypmathy, and I definitely do appreciate true care and concern. I'm a pretty straight shooter with explaining how I feel, so I'm not going to stop being honest now.

I'm really asking lately...why is all this crap happening to me??? Is there really a plan to all this?

Let me re-cap for you, and again, NOT trying to get pity here...

* Lost my baby boy in December.
* Student died in February.
* Sister diagnosed with Lymphoma in April.
* Dad continues to have Parkinson-like illness that remains undiagnosable, therefore
* While leaving Indy last week, found out my dad fell and shattered his upper arm,
requiring surgery. (Yes, the fall could have been worse.)
* While staying overnight with my dad in the hospital, my car gets broken into in the
parking lot. (Sure, kick me while I'm down.)

And wait, it gets even better--

* Didn't care much about most of the stolen items, but was devastated to see that
they stole a necklace my sister Miss gave me for my birthday. It had Tyler's
name etched on the silver pendant and the word "miracle" on the back. They also
took my mustard seed necklace that a friend gave to me in December. I'm not a
diamonds and pearls kind of girl, but those things meant a lot to me.

So, I can feel my boat rocking a lot, and I'm asking questions now... Is there any purpose to all of this? No, I'm not forever turning bitter, I'm just being honest.

I've trusted God's plan through all this, and sometimes it's just down-right scarey to think of what He may have planned next. Sometimes, I do feel like a walking target. No, I don't feel like this all the time...most of the time I know that there is purpose to it all, and I remind myself of my verse-- Jeremiah 29:11.

But right now, I'm just tired. I felt beaten down over the weekend and I'm still feeling it somewhat now. I don't have an inspiration-filled post, just an honest one.

I'm ready for the roller coaster to go up.

And I want my necklaces back, you little redneck jerk.

My Love

Too much to say for a miniscule post on my blog, but I will say this...

I am so thankful for a husband who supported me in spending the last 5 weeks away from him, as I helped my sister. Even though saying goodbye was painful, he never doubted that that was where I needed to be.

And I am even more thankful to be back with him now.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Life With My Sister

Since I'm with my sister in Ohio right now, most of my posting will be on her blog-- www.danceintherainmelissa.blogspot.com. I do have several things though that I want to write and post about here, so that will be coming hopefully soon.

For now, I'll leave you with this--

Aunt Jenn + pulling sister's kids in wagon + 5 mile walk to lake + 95 degrees (for real) = NOT GOOD

Fun times!